Learning to Trust Without a Map

There isn’t one testimony I’ve heard and thought,

“Oh my God, that’s going to be me.”

I’m very careful about inserting myself into patterns especially ones built from comparison or wishful thinking.

But what I have noticed is this: God has a pattern.

God is consistent. And in that consistency, I’ve started to see something clearly.

I’ve heard people say God closed every door to a 9–5 for them.

And here I am. Standing in that very place.

But I trust god .

Even when I don’t fully understand it.

Even when it feels uncomfortable.

Even when it looks nothing like what I expected.

Because the truth is, I can think of a million different ways to work.

I can keep searching.

I can keep asking people I know for referrals.

I can walk into places and ask to speak to the manager.

I can force doors.

I can strategize my way through uncertainty.

But I didn’t come this far to still be in control.

What I was grieving ….what I was crying about…. was my sense of control.

Letting it go didn’t feel holy at first. It felt scary.

It felt like loss.

But I didn’t forget

I meant it when I said it.

I gave god control of my life.

Not just the parts that feel safe.

Not just the parts that make sense.

So… dear god … have Your way.

If this season feels familiar .. if you’re also grieving control while trying to trust God .. I don’t think that’s coincidence.

You don’t have to rush clarity. You don’t have to force answers.

Sit with Him. Let Him lead.

And if you need a safe space to process what surrender looks like in your real life, I’m here. No fixing. No pressure. Just conversation.